Fair.

Wiynd sat at the bar eating her crisps

“Look lady, if you aren’t going to drink anything could you at least move over, that massive yo-yo of yours is taking up space a paying customer could have.”

“hey, I am paying! See this?” Wiynd waved her packet of crisps in front of the barman and half of the bag’s contents flew out over the bar and the barman.

“Are you going to clean that up lady?” the barman was not amused.

“Hey you clean it up, and get me more crisps, you should treat beautiful ladies like me better, if I decide I like this place men will come from miles around to buy me drinks, then you will be rich!”

“Beautiful?” The barman let loose “You’re as big as ten cows!”

“Hey, are you trying to say something? I’m the perfect weight!”

“What are you talking about, you already broke one of my stools and you’re making my floor creak!”

“How dare you say something like that, I’ll have you know I spend my life making sure I have a graceful style, you clearly just cant appreciate it!”

Zephyr who was sat further down the bar was getting a headache. He had had the one beer and was waiting for the second before he revealed to this Wiynd girl he was going to kill her. But she was hogging all the service.

“Graceful? You must weigh the same as a hundred elephan-”

“Shut up!” Zephyr had had enough. “Barman, give me a beer, or I’ll kill both of you.” Zephyr had a gun pointed at both.

“Geez, what a scary guy.” Wiynd said out loud.

The barman gave Zephyr a fresh bottle and he put his gun down before drinking it down as fast as gravity would allow. He then wiped his mouth, picked up his gun again and pointed it at Wiynd.

“HEY! I thought you said you wouldn’t kill us if you got your beer!”

Zephyr smiled “I said I wouldn’t kill ‘both’ of you, I’m afraid you tubby, are on my death list.” He pulled down his shirt sleeve and revealed his bracelet.”

Wiynd saw how many beads were lit up on it. “Holy SHI-”

Zephyr fired his gun and it was all Wiynd could do to pull her yo-yo to her and block the blast, but it still sent her flying back and crashing out the wall of the inn into the cold Norren night outside.

As zephyr got up and walked towards the huge hole in the wall the barman started to ask “Hey, I know she’s annoying, but who’s going to pay for th-” the barman didn’t finish his sentence, a bullet from zephyr’s gun separated most of the barman’s brain and his mouth quite effectively.

“By the way,” zephyr said to the barman’s falling corpse, “I’m a liar, I will kill you both.” at that he stepped out into the snow after Wiynd.

–

The snow fell lightly around zephyr as he stepped away from the inn, looking for where Wiynd had got to, when he heard her loudly proclaim. “Ladies and Gentlemen, young and old, welcome to the first ever show starring the great, the magnificent, Wiynd!” at that bright floodlights turned on all around zephyr revealing Wiynd stood before him atop her huge yo-yo. She must have set up the lights when he was dealing with the barman.

“you’re a weird one.”

“well it’s true there isn’t really an audience, but I like the spectacle you know? Plus its good practice for fights when there are spectators, I’ll be the greatest entertainer ever!”

“you know I am going to kill you right?”

“You’re going to try, but as you might have heard,” Wiynd jumped off her yo-yo and picked it up over her shoulder. “I spent a long time working on my style, when I beat you I’ll tell stories of how I slayed the most scary gunman in the snow, people will buy me more benapple sweetcake than I can eat.”

“Even if it were possible to beat me.” Zephyr pulled out his new shotgun, “its impossible for there to be a limit to how much food you could eat fatty.”

“Hey!” Wiynd launched her yo-yo at Zephyr and he readied himself for the real battle.